OPENING - STARTS @ 5PM
UPDATED 1-29-2023
RCA Meeting Format
5 minutes prior to the start of the meeting start asking people to read the Preamble, the 12 Steps for Couples in Recovery, the 12 Traditions, the Safety Guidelines, and the Promises.
Opening
"Hello, my name is ________ , and I am a _________ in recovery with _______ (partner's name). (Your partner follows by saying) Hello, my name is_________, and I am a _______ in recovery with ________ (partner's name)." Welcome to this meeting for recovering couples wanting healthy intimate relationships. As a courtesy to the group, please silence all devices for the meeting.
When New Couples Attend/Couples' Introductions:
Acknowledge any new couples attending the meeting for the first time. Everyone in the group goes around and introduces himself or herself, including the newcomers. (Instruct them they may just say, "My name is ____ _, I am a newcomer to recovery."
To Safeguard Anonymity:
If a new couple enters the meeting late, which would be after the couples' introductions, pause the meeting and ask the couple "What meeting are you looking for?" If the couple does not give a clear answer inform the couple that this is a closed meeting for couples dealing with sex, love, or relationship addiction and their partners.
Let's open with a moment of silence for the couple who still suffers followed by the Serenity Prayer. In the Serenity Prayer, we use the words "us" and "we."
The Serenity Prayer:
God, grant us the serenity To accept the things we cannot change, Courage to change the things we can, And the wisdom to know the difference.
Ours is a fellowship of men and women recovering from addictions, behavioral problems, and nonfunctioning relationships. We share our experience, strength, and hope with each other so that we may solve our common problems, and help restore our relationships.
I've asked a friend to read the "Preamble"
I've asked a friend to read the "12 Steps for Couples in Recovery"
(1st meeting of the month) I've asked a friend to read the "12 Traditions"- the one that corresponds with the current month, as well as the first paragraph from Recovering Couples Anonymous, A Twelve-Step Program for Couples book. The paragraph is at the bottom of the 12 traditions sheet.
I've asked a friend to read the "Safety Guidelines."
During the meeting, a voluntary sign-in sheet will be passed around twice. The first pass is to collect names, numbers, and emails. The second pass is to let us take names and numbers to connect for sponsorship, support, and program calls. In addition, we pass the donation basket for the in-person attendants. If you are online, a link will be sent in the chat to make a contribution. The suggested donation is $2-5 per meeting. Newcomers are not asked to donate on their first visit but can do so if they wish. (Circulate the donation basket with the sign-in sheets during both passes.)
Now is the time for us to share our experience, strength, and hope. If one member of a Coupleship shares, the other member may share next if she or he chooses. We ask that we avoid cross-talk by addressing the meeting as a whole rather than an individual in the meeting. No one has "the right answer," and we do not give advice. Opinions expressed are strictly those of the speaker. Take what you like and leave the rest. The leaders will share for 5 minutes each, and the remaining couples in the group will share for 3 minutes each. Please observe the timer.
Would someone please be the timekeeper?
Ask the couple leading to begin.
Closing
(At 5:55 PM close the meeting) This is all the time we have for sharing. Before we close does anyone have an urgent need to share?
We are on a chip system. Would anyone like a welcome chip? It represents an outward symbol of an inner commitment to stay sober from our couple’s self-defined bottom-line behaviors one day at a time.
We also celebrate milestones in continuous sobriety. Is there a couple celebrating a milestone? 1 month, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months? Years or multiples of years? (If you'd like to celebrate a birthday, please let the chair couple know at least 6 weeks in advance so we can order a chip for you.)
Also, there is RCA-related literature available for purchase on the table.
Are there any RCA-related meeting announcements?
(Ask for a couple to lead and chair the next meeting.)
I've asked a friend to read ''The Promises for Couples in Recovery."
If you have not made your donation online, please click the link in the chat before we close and donate the suggested $2-5, thanks.
Let's close the meeting with the Serenity prayer. Please share in a moment of silence for the couple who still suffers followed by the Serenity Prayer. In the Serenity Prayer, we use the words "us" and "we."
The Serenity Prayer:
God, grant us the serenity To accept the things we cannot change, Courage to change the things we can, And the wisdom to know the difference.
Preamble 12 Steps 12 Traditions Safety Guidelines The Promises